Corrections from Burning Man 2012

Correction – this photo is of the 2011 Burning Man. We regret the error.

In an attempt to keep our community informed, I am correcting some of the more egregious errors I propagated at 2012’s Burning Man.

Correction:  Turning in a Census form is not, as some of you may have heard me say on several  radio broadcasts, mandatory.  You do not need a sticker from the Census in order to see the Man burn.  The Rangers were not checking to see who had stickers.  None of this was true.  I regret the error.

Correction:  Despite what was said on the radio by the Census in response to the previous lie, you did not need to get an image release form from Media Mecca in order to participate in the live Squirrel Nut Zippers video being filmed on the playa.  Not only does Media Mecca not have image release forms, but there was no Squirrel Nut Zippers video.  Really now.

Correction:  It turns out that really was Harley Dubois’ niece the other night.  I regret my loud, unnecessary skepticism.

Correction:  Even though several people you know might have said it was true, the Census was not actually offering a free dinner in exchange for going through a half-hour long “detailed demographic interview.”  I honestly don’t even know where that story came from.

Correction:  In an earlier correction I said that I honestly didn’t know where a particular story came from.  This was untrue:  I know exactly where it came from.  I apologize for the typo that led to this error.

Correction:  It was not a typo that led to this error.

Correction:  Despite what you may have been told by those treacherous bastards at BMIR , Skrillex was not playing at Media Mecca at 4:30 on Saturday afternoon.  As if he’d play an afternoon show.  Come on.

Correction:  Despite what a confederate and I may have told you, there is no “Burning Man Department of Vocabulary” that requests information about your language use at Black Rock City.  We were, however, sincerely interested in the development of a new word that means “a deep emotional attachment to the idea of having sex with a person with whom you feel no particular emotional attachment.”  Please put your suggestions in the comments field below.

Also, despite what we may have told you at the conclusion of the questionnaire, we did not actually appreciate your time.  We were self-evidently wasting it.

Correction:  I did know where the cool absinthe bar was.  I just didn’t want to go there with your friends.  I stand by this error.

Correction:  Despite what some of you may have thought, telling people to go to Media Mecca “to get the wireless password” is not actually an effective prank.  Your heart’s in the right place;  it’s just that Media Mecca already has so many people wandering in asking “how do I get online?” every day that we had no way of knowing that we were being fucked with.  We didn’t even know something was going on until you told us.

Correction:  Never mind what I said, I actually was trying to sleep with you.  Deep down, I think you knew that.

Caveat is the Volunteer Coordinator for Media Mecca at Burning Man. His opinions are in no way statements of the Burning Man organization. Contact him at Caveat (at) Burningman.com

About the author: Caveat Magister

Caveat grew up wanting to be a Russian novelist, but the closest he ever came was getting personally insulted by the first democratically elected president of Poland. Now the volunteer coordinator for Burning Man's Media Team (itself a volunteer position), Caveat has been messing with Burners for the last five years, and has a hard time believing some of the stuff they've let him get away with. He is a publisher at Omnibucket.com, served as editor of Chicken John’s philosophical autobiography “The Book of the Is,” and archives his publications and personal blogs at www.TheWachsGallery.com.

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