DPW Talent Nite

Yes, it was as scary as it sounds.

Mayfield was really excited about having a talent show. He kept announcing it at the morning meetings, almost ad nauseam. It sounded like a pretty dorky idea at first, but Mayfield has a knack for convincing people – and besides, he kept reminding us that we could do it DPW-style.

He was right, too. He had wrangled up a big group of volunteers for the weekend; the Black Rock Social Club was packed to the gills for the best talent show this little blogger has ever seen.

Click any small photo to enlarge it. And please excuse the dust on my camera lens!

The show was hosted by Tremain Calm and Sleep Dep. Pandragon and Tom each performed spoken word (which was excellent, despite Mayfield’s repeated warnings that anyone reciting poetry would be fed to Lazlo). Next up was a very disturbing clown act by Fitz in Your Mouth.

Then M came up and shook her hoop all over the tiny stage. That takes some skill, if you ask me.

Jimi, Dove, Dace, and myself each performed a song or two – including Dace’s own song, Mr. Sun. He won a prize for that one.

But the night was just getting started, really. Katy Bell, Michelle, and Bean took it to a whole new level with their bar-dancing routine.

And it just kept going from there. Next was the Chubby Weenie contest, in which Matt, Coyote, DA, and Fitz stuffed vienna sausages in their mouths until (a) the taste made them spit everything up or (b) they could no longer pronounce “chubby weenie”.

Most of the contestants could only handle three or four sausages before they had to spit – but Matt, fearless as ever, stuffed nineteen in. It looked like a clear victory until, in a surprise attack, Goat Man Dan reached into the bucket and ate a handful of spit-up vienna sausages, trumping the contest and claiming the prize for himself. (Goat Man Dan was later seen returning all of the sausages to the bucket in a slightly more digested form, but nobody blamed him.)

That there is the next event: shotgunning beers while the stereo played “Beer is Good For You”. Kimball was the clear winner in this one, and was decidedly loopy for the rest of the night. In fact, everyone in the house was beaming: this was our last big night of the season, and we were all glad to be there.

Now, at this point, the club had taken on more of a house-party vibe. We were all in it to the bitter end. We were all in it for the creamed corn slide and wrestling.

It really seemed like the right thing to do. We had all this corn left over from Exodus, and some tarps, and a ramp between the two rooms of the club. What would you have done?

I, for one, decided to put my camera away. Let the next part live in infamy. All I can tell you is that Pandragon won…

But I will leave you with one last image: Arcane, our medic, leading the crew that tied up (and wrote on, and eventually shaved the head of) poor Tom when he fell asleep with his shoes on.

Now that’s talent.

About the author: The Hun

The Hun, also known as J.H. Fearless, has been blogging for Burning Man (and many other outlets) since 2005, which is also the year she joined the BRC DPW on a whim that turned out to be a lifetime commitment. Since then she's won some awards for blogging, built her own creative business, and produced some of the Burning Blog's most popular stories and series. She co-created a grant-funded art piece, "Refoliation," in 2007, and stood next to it watching as the Man burned on Monday. She considers that, in many ways, to have been the symbolic end of Burning Man that was. The Hun lives in Reno with DPW Shade King, Quiet Earp. You may address her as "The Hun" or "Hun". If you call her "Honey" she reserves the right to cut you.

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